Dolly Parton voiced some strong support for the LGBT community in her recent Billboard interview.
Billboard asked: “You have a large gay following. To what do you attribute that?”
Dolly answered: “They know that I completely love and accept them, as I do all people. I’ve struggled enough in my life to be appreciated and understood. I’ve had to go against all kinds of people through the years just to be myself. I think everybody should be allowed to be who they are, and to love who they love. I don’t think we should be judgmental. Lord, I’ve got enough problems of my own to pass judgment on somebody else.”
Her observations are important for many reasons, not at least because of her strong standing among many American Christians. There is unfortunately much homophobia and transphobia in some conservative Christian circles.
“Dollywood attracts lots of church groups,” Billboard asks, “but it has also become a draw for the LGBT community. What does that say about you?”
Her reply:
“It’s a place for entertainment, a place for all families, period. It’s for all that. But as far as the Christians, if people want to pass judgment, they’re already sinning. The sin of judging is just as bad as any other sin they might say somebody else is committing. I try to love everybody.”
This comment is actually a reference to the New Testament, Luke 6:37, where Jesus says: "Do not judge others, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn others, or it will all come back against you. Forgive others, and you will be forgiven.“ This is a quote easily forgotten by more dogmatic and narrow minded Christians.
“My dad views the world like we’re still outsiders,” said 18-year-old Hanoy Urtarte, who before graduation dreamed of leaving New Jersey behind to seek higher education in San Francisco.
Since he came out of the closet three years ago, his conservative, Dominican-American father has had trouble fully accepting his grownup child’s sexuality.
“When I first came out to my dad, it struck him hard enough that made him feel as if he lost his son,” explained Hanoy. “My dad has a hard time trying to understand me being gay. He’s definitely still confused about it.”
I wanted to start this comic for a few reasons. First, the internet, lush with trans resources and stories, was a tremendous help when I was trying to figure myself out. […] I figured I could add something worthwhile to the online trans community that has already helped me so much.
Secondly, it’s a fun creative outlet for me. Anyone going through a gender and/or sex transition could use a medium through which to express oneself along the way. Even though this webcomic is no autobiography, it allows me to think about and share issues that trans masculine folk may encounter.
Thirdly, activism! Right now my most pertinent cause is trans visibility. I understand that plenty of trans people may not want to incorporate their trans experience into their everyday lives, which is fine. I’m not saying everyone needs to do so. I do wish that knowledge about trans lives was more commonplace, though. My goal is to expand trans media, thereby increasing visibility, one silly comic at a time.
“I’m often amazed that, for example, otherwise polite people, who would nearly never walk up to an acquaintance or complete stranger and ask if they’ve had an abortion (or some other similarly private, personal medical information), will blithely ask a trans person whether they’re planning to have genital surgery. Curiosity isn’t a justification for this.
[…] People are often confronting a trans person for the first time (that they know about at least – they may well have already encountered a trans person and had no idea). People are curious. But unfortunately, this often translates into a trans person being seen as a living library on all things transgender. Trans people often face a barrage of questions: When did you know? Will you change your hair? Do you want me to take you shopping? How did your family react? How did your colleagues respond? Do you still like men/women? What’s involved with a transition?
These are all reasonable questions, in the right context. But those contexts usually involve more intimate conversations between friends and where the trans person has made it clear that they’re open to talk about such things.”
I'm sorry but gay males really don't like girlfags
crossdreamers answered
I have never met a gay man (outside of tumblr) who dislikes girlfags. Sure, my gay friends are not sexually attracted to women, but there is little hostility towards girlfags. The related term “fag hag” (a straight woman who loves to be with gay and bisexual men) is normally used as a term of endearment.
That being said, there are girlfags who have gay male lovers. Their lovers respond to their masculinity, not to their female physiognomy.
It seem to me too many on tumblr reduce “girlfaggery” to an issue of “attraction to”. It is just as much a matter of “feeling like”.
Many of the girlfags I know are transgender (in the broad umbrella sense of “gender variant”). They dream of being a gay man with a gay man. In this respect, whether gay men actually love them back is beside the point. This is how they feel. This is their identity.
And in spite of what many believe, the fact that they want to be a gay man with a man, does not make it impossible for them to find love. Girlfags often bond with straight and bisexual gender bending men, men who respond to the girlfag’s sense of masculinity with some kind of femininity.
Note that I am using the words masculinity and femininity in their broadest sense here. This is not about living up to the pink and blue stereotypes. The masculinity of girlfags is as diverse and many-faceted as the masculinity of butch lesbians.
I love the following quote from a gay man taking part in the discussions over at the Facebook girlfag/guydyke-forum:
“Masculinity and the erotic attraction of maleness do not have to be the sole preserve of bio males who are gay. I love and appreciate the fact that girlfags appreciate gay men as other gay men appreciate gay men. I suspect that girlfaggery is much more prevalent than people think.”
And yes, he is right about this being much more common than people think. The popularity of yaoi comics, slash fantasies and M/M romances tells us that many women respond to the idea of being allowed to express some kind of masculine sexuality and/or masculine gender identity. This does not mean that they are all transsexual (although some of them are). It simply means that the world of sexual orientation and gender identity is much more complex than some would like us to believe.
(The woman in the photo is Katharine Hepburn. And yes, she was a girlfag.)
Do you want to be a better ally to trans* people? Are you cis? I want to help you. Here is a list of five things you can do, and now, to be better at supporting trans* people.
Everyone needs allies. Maybe you’re lucky enough to have a friend, parent or significant other who gets you and support you. Yay! Chances are you know someone who might be a good ally with the right knowledge. In that case, this post might come in handy.
Lady Valor: Documentary abut Kristin Beck, transgender ex Navy Seal
“I fought for 20 years for life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, and I want some happiness. This is my life.”
These are the words of Kristin Beck, a decorated Navy Seal who through 20 years of military service carried the secret of true self deep within. The movie Lady Valor is the story about her courageous journey from Chris to Kristin.
“No one ever met the real me,” Beck says in the trailer for the film. “No one knew anything.”
At a party, in a checkout line or out to dinner, transgender model Arisce Wanzer has this to say about routine, uncomfortable questions from strangers and acquaintances:
“Why are you jumpin’ into my underwear from the get-go?”
We asked Wanzer, 27, in Los Angeles, and two other trans people — Janet Mock, 31, and Joy Ladin, 53 — to share how they handle chance, intrusive encounters.
Have you had surgery?
Ladin: Asking intimate questions about someone’s body is the same whether that person is trans or not, so if you wouldn’t walk up to someone at a party and say, “Do you have one testicle or two?” you probably shouldn’t ask a trans person if they’ve had genital surgery.
I think it’s important for people to know that trans people often don’t feel safe. We might not feel safe because we’re in the early stages of transition and that’s often when we get asked questions, but we also might feel vulnerable just because we never know how somebody is going to feel about talking to a trans person. So when I feel safe in a casual encounter I’m pretty happy to talk about gender identity. It’s an interest.
